“There's resilience inside my face ...”

 

(Everything but the girl (1996))

 



Today’s post is about the issue of whether I am sufficiently resilient to deal properly, with my post-accident, adversity? Or, to put it in other ways:

 

·      Do I exhibit and actually have enough fortitude to do this? and 

 

·      Do I have the strength and “courage to come back”?

 

So - “come back” to where?

 

In all fairness, “come back” isn’t an ideal expression, as I can’t return to Phil v1.0. 

 

What I am actually doing, is motoring on towards an acceptance of adaptation. I am striving for contentment with the genesis and ongoing development of Phil v2.0 and his lifestyle.

 

I am only seeking to “come back” to feelings of happiness and of pride.

 

This can at times, feel like a very uphill struggle, and it begs the question:

 

“Do I have enough resilience to commence and keep up the fight?”

 

I think that an application of resilience, is more than a one-off exercise. It is needed throughout my journey towards self-acceptance.

 

Right out the outset, I believe that it is important to have an ultimate endpoint (in general terms) in mind. As I have said, I believe that it is (so far as I am able) to reach a “contentment with the genesis and ongoing development of Phil v2.0 and his lifestyle” 

 

Even this conclusion has required some fortitude. It would have been easy to take the view that nothing is wrong, or that even if it is, there is no point even thinking about such a destination, as it is impossibly out of reach. I did though, manage (with guidance and other support) to conclude that I was severely discontented with my position and that something needed to be done about it ... I didn’t “throw the towel in”, before I had even started to give serious consideration to my journey - and this needed some inner strength.

 

Having decided where I am headed, I needed to settle on a mode of transport. By this I mean, how am I going to reach my destination (or get as close to it as is possible).

 

As I hope is being illustrated, I am involved in an ongoing exercise, of devising appropriate strategies (be they proposed activities or otherwise) that I believe will, in combination, fuel my journey. Doing so does though, require some (supported) effort, on my part. I need to ensure ongoing self-motivation and accept the desirability of some outside help. Once I am sufficiently motivated and assisted, I then need actually, to make and keep under review my detailed plans. Overall - so far so good, and I believe that the ‘resilience box” is ticked here.

 

That said, making and keeping under review my plans, is only as good as turning the ignition key.  I then need to press the accelerator and keep it pressed - there is no point making plans if I don’t implement them!

 

I have to confess that this is my particular weakness. I can make all manner of plans but will then quite frequently, fail to put them into effect or will abandon their implementation in the light of setbacks or doubts. This is an area where for me, some real resilience is needed. I need to overcome these weaknesses by an appreciation that: 

 

·      We all suffer setbacks and doubts, which must be met with fortitude and flexibility

 

·   Offers of assistance are valuable and if needed, ought to be accepted gratefully; and

 

·    It is easier to implement a plan, if it is broken down into “bitesize chunks”. Doing so can of course, generate ongoing satisfaction through the achievement of duly manageable goals.

 

 

In fairness to myself, this “weakness” is not absolute, and I am chugging along, albeit not as fast as should be the case!

 

Must try harder ...!




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