“Those who can, do...

...those who can’t, teach”

(George Bernard Shaw 1905)





This picture, is one of me, performing (!) at a recent “gig”...

 

A few weeks ago, I again presented my brain injury survivor’s story to psychology students at the University of Bolton.

 

A little while before that, I presented (online) to Headway Wales.

 

As I have said before, speaking and writing in respect of brain injury, has become a very important part of my life.

 

So why, in particular?

 

To coin (again!) some OT jargon:

 

It constitutes “meaningful occupation, in facilitation of my emotional wellbeing”.

 

One might, of course paraphrase this, as something along the lines of “doing stuff; “cos it cheers me up”!

 

I guess that simplistically, this isn’t too far off the mark. I do indeed take pleasure from these activities; and as you will imagine, I need all the positive emotional movements that I can get!

 

It is however worth drilling a little deeper, here:

 

Why does writing and speaking make me feel good (or at least, better)?

 

As I have said in other contexts its preparation and delivery, serve as beneficial distraction. If I’m busy, then there is less time to feel sorry for myself.

 

I do however believe that activity of this kind, can have a positive effect on some of my more specific “shortcomings”.

 

My overriding depressed state for so much of the time, is in part, a direct result of my injury.


It is however an indirect result, in that changes which the accident has brought about, can also have a very negative effect on my mood. For example, activities that I can no longer undertake, or which have had to be significantly adapted.

 

One source of my sadness is a feeling of a lack of self-worth, purpose and direction. A big contributory factor to this is the fact that I can no longer live with others, nor pursue my career.

 

So far as my job is concerned, I can no longer practice as a lawyer, but (in addition to my voluntary work), maybe I am developing an alternative “career”?

 

Recently, a significant case management organization, wrote and published this article, about me:

 

https://www.akacasemanagement.com/phils-journey-transforming-adversity-into-advocacy-and-art/


If I might quote from it:

 

“Phil has embraced a new role in the brain injury community….

 

In his own words – being “professionally brain injured”!

 

He has become a sought-after speaker and writer on brain injury topics, sharing his insights with psychology students, occupational therapists/students, and more widely.

 

He has delivered university lectures and conference presentations. Phil has spoken at Headway events and was invited to be a “main speaker” at that charity’s last scheduled annual conference.  At a recent national annual conference of the Royal College of Occupational Therapists, Phil served as the closing plenary speaker.


For Phil, these activities serve not only to educate others but also to rebuild his sense of purpose and self-worth.

 

Speaking about his experiences allows him to connect with others and to contribute positively to the brain injury community.

 

Phil’s work in raising awareness has become a cornerstone of his journey.”

 

Please let me stress these lines, therefrom:

 

“For Phil, these activities serve not only to educate others but also to rebuild his sense of purpose and self-worth.”

 

I might no longer practice as a business lawyer; but I now do something else, instead.

 

Very different in many respects, but “different isn’t necessarily worse”!


I now have a new role and am becoming increasingly comfortable with it.

 

In addition to direction and purpose, I have already mentioned a need for feelings of self-worth.

 

Let me just take it a little further and mention a craving for pride.

 

These activities have most definitely contributed to that. Repeated requests for me to write and speak, rather speak for themselves.

 

Following another recent presentation, I received these words from the organizer:

 

“It was such an honour hosting you and hearing your story, and I’m glad that I introduced you as an inspirational speaker because you really are”!

 

Just finally (and its relevance will hopefully become apparent shortly), my last Bolton presentation included a little new material on social cognition and some ways in which the injury has affected my social life.




In short...

 

despite once enjoying very much personal and professional social interaction, this often feels to be very much a thing of the pre-head bump days.

 

There are probably several reasons for this but among them is an unwarranted fear of saying the “wrong thing”, or otherwise inciting criticism.

 

I also have concerns about my possible misunderstanding, of what has been said to me.

 

For these and other reasons, I tend nowadays to have rather cut myself off from others.


This is my own choice, but nevertheless, feelings of loneliness can arise.

 

What I think would help me here, is an enhanced “safe” social life in which to “rehearse” my social skills.

 

I have already, inadvertently commenced this practice through my voluntary work.

 

Speaking also (necessarily) involves social interaction, in circumstances where my concerns are highly unlikely to be realised. In this way, being a professionally brain injured speaker, is helping me with another mental issue.







 


 





 

 

 

 







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